The world is turning upside down. Nothing is as it was and it can never be, again. I just want to go screaming through the streets running until I can't run anymore. Screwdrivers in power outlets. Teeth gnashing. Hair pulling. Aything to end the numbness. To end the sadness. To make me feel hope again. To make me feel whole again.

I am empty. I am desolate. I am not handling this well.

The "work me" is a shell.. barely going through the motions... itching to scream and run and rage and cry... deeply entrenched in an inner world of my own making and hardly registering what's going on around me.

I'm not handling this well.