My dearest, sweet, loveable, cuddly, darling Nami is gone. He was attacked tonight, and killed. We don't know by what, but we suspect the neighbour dogs. The same ones who attacked Rainy twice before. They may just have chased away whatever actually killed him, but we don't know. I haven't talked to the neighbour, yet, I haven't checked the neighbour's dogs over for scratches. I got home from the clay studio at about 11:30pm and Matthew told me what happened. I'm furious, heartbroken and stunned. My beautiful home in the country seems marred somehow... and definitely empty.... definitely missing something. I feel like I failed him.

All I can say for sure at this moment is that I loved him. I still love him. My dear sweet Nami. Nothing can chase him, now. Nothing can hurt him where he is. Tomorrow, I will say goodbye and bury him in the forest, place a cairn over him so nothing can desecrate the place his body is resting. Then, he will be able to come with me to school, and I'll not have to leave him behind. Champ will welcome him and be his friend, that I am certain. They were two of a kind.

I think what hurts the most is that I hadn't even completely bonded with Nami, yet. He loved me, as he loved everyone and cuddled with everyone... but I did not yet know every little quirk and habit of his. I couldn't yet decipher what he was feeling every moment just from the way he moved or looked at me.... though I was learning. I have so many memories from the short time he was with us, but they all just break my heart right now. I'm very, deeply sorry that the time was so very short.

People sometimes wonder why I love my pets so much, when the loss of those pets hurts me so deeply. I can only tell them that the loss is nothing compared to the love. The pain receeds with time and the love still remains. We will have another cat come to live with us, one day. This one will stay indoors... and he will be loved, as deeply as any, in his own special way.

I should try to get some sleep... I had just caught up on it all yesterday... (11 hours) and I have so much to do at school in the coming weeks... I will try. Soon.