Work was rough today. Too busy, too many people missing and too many calls to get much sense of resolution. Add in the factor of me drifting into a dream world and it made for one strangely surreal and irritating day.

The dreamworld I've let myself slip into involves having a huge crush on the instructor that took us out this weekend. I'm too old for crushes, and yet I have one. I'll never act on it, but my oh my do I ever drift off aimlessly into thoughts of what it would have been like to sneak into his tent on Saturday night! I found him attractive for a number of reasons: British accent, excellent teacher with nearly as much enthusiasm for teaching as he had for the outdorrs (TONS), knowledgeable about backcountry travel, safety and camping, lithe, lean body, great sense of humour, smiling eyes, believes in low-impact camping, and at the end of the trip I got an amazing hug from him. Good hugs say a lot about a person. I keep thinking about him and it's just WRONG. Why? Well... because I'm using this made-up feeling as a band-aid for my recent breakup... and... he's married. He doesn't wear a ring, but that's probably because he's a rock climber.. he only mentioned his wife once.. and that was at the pre-trip meeting.

Still... I did enjoy hiking behind him... nice view. ;-)

I'm not ready for a real relationship yet... but I shouldn't let myself drift off into dreamland and ignore the reality of healing and growth that I truly need. I will, however, join a backcountry hiking/camping club and see if I can meet more like-minded people.

I had such a fantastic time... not only because of the fun of the crush, but I learned tons about hiking, making and breaking camp, cooking outdoors, staying safe in bear country and a whole host of other things. I'll write up some tips and tricks that I learned on the trip and make up some kind of web page... one day. ;-)

For now it's time to go take my sweet doggie for a walk.