Been figuring out what to do about the logistics of moving. Getting stuff out of storage before the 13th so as not to have to pay for another month, figuring out packing and when/how to move things from my brother's place to M.'s place, figuring out how to get cheap/free paint to paint my bedroom there before I leave.... all before the end of the month, while fitting in several rehersals and performances of "Eat Your Heart Out" with the Emerald Pig Theatrical Society as well as attending seminars and pottery classes.

Whew!

Not to mention finding work.

I have also finally heard from Family Services about my b-mom. I now know that this summer I was probably right accross the street from where she lives during my travels to the Kootenays.

Amazing.

I don't know if I'm pushing the impact of this news down or if the biggest impact (aside from actual contact with her) hit when I was informed that they'd found her, and that I have a full sister and a half sister...

So much to think about there, but I'm trying hard not to OVER think it - I don't want to stick any huge expectations on the meeting or on who she is, who they are, how I'll fit in, if I'll fit in... but I really can't help doing it. At least I realize that all they are is 'expectations' and they are no indication of what the reality will be.

Busy weeks ahead even without a job, though money will become an issue fairly soon. *sigh* Why can't I just be paid millions just to be the wonderful human being that I am? *cough*

How different has life turned out to be than I thought it would last March? I was ready to buy my own place/give up everything and travel/be on my own forever and ever amen.... and none of that has happened. I'm still changing and growing... I still miss George at times - mainly because his new woman has taken him away from me and made him see it as "weird" that we would still be friends. He made the choice to tell me how weird he now thinks it is, though... ah well. I vow to not initiate contact this time... but to wait and see what happens. He'll always have a friend here should he need one but the energy I've been putting into maintaining our friendship is costing me too much... up to him, now.

Instead of remaining single and becoming an old maid, I met M. He changed my mind about the being single thing by being so much like me. We share opinions, beliefs, hobbies, dreams..... so much.... and we're both at the same place in life. Not to mention that I think he's gorgeous. ;-) Big blue eyes, dark hair with big, loose curls, thick dark mysterious eyebrows, oh-so-kissable lips.... I could go on but I'm sure I already have at some time in this blog and I'd just be repeating myself. ;-)

Being engaged still doesn't seem real to me... I don't think it will seem real until we go and pick up our mural... is it just pre-engagement jitters? Is it the fact that life, once again, is upside down? The difference this time is that I know and can see the direction that I am headed. I know what I have accomplished by 2010. It's not just fluff any more.... though I still sit in inaction and don't go for it hardcore as I would like to be. Fear. Wimpy-ass fear. I can and will overcome it. I can and will accomplish something towards my future goals TODAY.

Better get on that. ;-)

Not feeling very motivated to find a new job this past week. Still not motivated to go out THIS week, either. Too much else going on. :-/

I'll be moving at the end of this month. Since M. and I will be engaged, my criteria for moving in together is satisfied and I will be moving back to Vancouver to share space with him and wonderful upstairs neighbours/landlords, too. I will miss this place, however. The yard rocks for Rainy, the house is cozy and sweet. The kitchen is large and functional... but I *will* have all my own kitchen supplies again, that'll make things better than they are there, now. ;-) We will also be able to paint and make it fun, funky and cozy the way I've made my room, here. Have to ask my roomies if they want me to paint that room back to beige (blah) before I go, or leave it as is. We shall see.

Things to do this coming month:

Find a job. Meh.
Do lighting for play. Whee!
Move things out of storage and into Vancouver.
Move me to Vancouver.
More pottery.
Make Soap. (I got a soap making kit for Christmas - belatedly yesterday...) and I just bought a great book from Value Village on soap making from scratch. Looks awesome and I plan to make lots. Expect soap, knitting (possibly) and pottery as Christmas gifts this year, folks. That's all you're getting!

Had a good visit with Mom learning and practicing the knit stitch for knitting... purl? perl? pearl? comes next... ;-) I'm slow and I add and drop stitches occasionally, but practice makes perfect. I have my Grandma's knitting needles and her knitting bag. It's very pretty, wicker-ish thing with bright coloured flowers all over one side. Very 60's my Mom says... Dunno, I wasn't around for those.

After the Mom and Dad visit, I went over to my honourary aunt and uncle's place. They're more like great friends of mine than friends of my Mom and Dad's... we talked about life, my Mom, my Dad, my wonderful M and a whole host of other things. We ate freshly baked scones and had tasty soup and when I wondered why I was yawning so much and checked my watch discovered that it was 10 minutes to midnight and I'd been there since around 4:15!! Time flies when you spend it with wonderful people.

Hum. How much more haircut can I be? I'll stop now and post again when I'm more inspired.