How different has life turned out to be than I thought it would last March? I was ready to buy my own place/give up everything and travel/be on my own forever and ever amen.... and none of that has happened. I'm still changing and growing... I still miss George at times - mainly because his new woman has taken him away from me and made him see it as "weird" that we would still be friends. He made the choice to tell me how weird he now thinks it is, though... ah well. I vow to not initiate contact this time... but to wait and see what happens. He'll always have a friend here should he need one but the energy I've been putting into maintaining our friendship is costing me too much... up to him, now.

Instead of remaining single and becoming an old maid, I met M. He changed my mind about the being single thing by being so much like me. We share opinions, beliefs, hobbies, dreams..... so much.... and we're both at the same place in life. Not to mention that I think he's gorgeous. ;-) Big blue eyes, dark hair with big, loose curls, thick dark mysterious eyebrows, oh-so-kissable lips.... I could go on but I'm sure I already have at some time in this blog and I'd just be repeating myself. ;-)

Being engaged still doesn't seem real to me... I don't think it will seem real until we go and pick up our mural... is it just pre-engagement jitters? Is it the fact that life, once again, is upside down? The difference this time is that I know and can see the direction that I am headed. I know what I have accomplished by 2010. It's not just fluff any more.... though I still sit in inaction and don't go for it hardcore as I would like to be. Fear. Wimpy-ass fear. I can and will overcome it. I can and will accomplish something towards my future goals TODAY.

Better get on that. ;-)