Sometimes I wonder why I put up with your crap. I know I have crap of my own, you sometimes put up with it and sometimes don't... sometimes my crap triggers yours or vice versa. Still, I sometimes wonder why I put up with your crap. There is so much positive in our lives for you to be so negative all the time. I care about you so much... I WANT you so much... but I don't feel that coming back from you, except ever so seldom and usually it's when I ask you to tell me, or show me... and even then it doesn't happen each time I ask. Why does my heart break when I look at you and feel so much desire for you? Because I don't think the feeling is reciprocated. Maybe it is, but I sure don't feel it. Why not? I look at a stranger, admiring a tattoo, or the line of a muscle... and I get more joy. That's not right. What can I do to stop feeling this way?